On further reflection, one of the other things which struck me watching the Insight program were the women (and men) who hid their pain and didn’t speak out about it. My memories of the first few months after having my first child are a little hazy but I do remember that once I spoke out about how I was feeling in my mother’s group, then it was like giving them permission to talk frankly about how they felt.
Why is it that we hide this suffering from the ones we love or even from society in general? It’s not a weakness to say “hey, I’m not feeling great” or “this is not how I imagined it would be like”. Having a baby can be very isolating – I had no hesitation in telling people that this is how I felt; I just don’t know how I would have coped without doing so. My partner and friends were magnificent and I was very lucky. I didn’t have a mum nearby and my wonderful parents in law were working (as were most of my mates!) but talking about it does make a difference.
Don’t pretend, let it out – you’d be amazed at how many people feel the same way or at how many people can help you.
